So, the title caught ya, which means you’re either curious, or you know damn well just how this feels.
Dealing with Depression.
DEALING with Depression.
The saying isn’t, “going on adventures with Depression”, or “thriving with Depression” (although either of these would make some very interesting, yet positive, blogs!).
But the general rule is that people are out here, every minute, every day, dealing with Depression. And, more oftentimes than not, it isn’t a positive interaction. It just IS. Plain and Simple.
Currently, I’m writing this at 3am because I’m feeling very sad. I’m starting to have doubts about the way my stories are written, and if they’ll ever be something that the majority would ever read.
On my more manic days, I’m content—almost happy—about the way my books are going. Not major sellers, but not really duds either. Some days I’m okay being just a small time author.
But on my more depressive days, that just isn’t the case at all. I’m devastated that more people aren’t buying/reviewing my book(s). I’m heartbroken that no one knows my name! And you know what? Deep in my messed up cranium, I KNOW this to be unreasonable.
And yet, I can’t stop the everflowing waves of doubt that cascade over me.
On my manic days, I feel like I could conquer the world. On my depressive days? Forget about it. I just feel like tucking myself into bed and completely giving up on my dreams.
So, how has this effected my writing career and the whole publishing/marketing aspect of my life?
Well, for starters, I fall behind very easily. I may be chugging along for days, weeks, even months, and then all of a sudden I just stop any and all activities related to writing. In my head, I think, "what’s the point?”, and I push myself off the path for awhile.
For marketing/promoting, it’s the same deal. Deep in my chest I feel that I’m just wasting my time, and the intrusive thoughts start getting louder, drowning out any positive voices that might be trying to seep through.
How do I help myself? And if you’re feeling this way, whether it be about writing, or a small business, or anything, what advice would I give to you?
I think I’d have to say to write yourself notes. Give yourself a mantra. Tell those wailing sirens in your head that they don’t control you, that they aren’t the ones to show you what you are worth.
For those of you that aren’t dealing with Depression, or even if you are, I recommend words of encouragement to those that may be struggling, or to really anyone in general. While validation from others isn’t exactly the healthiest way of coping, in the end it may be exactly what we need to help remind us of our own worth! The key word here being REMIND.
There are days where I’m in my depressive episodes and I will think back to some of the positive things that were said to me in order to get me through.
“No, Kati. You’re book isn’t trash. That person on Barnes and Noble said they couldn’t put it down!”
To a small business owner, a small time hobbyist, an independent author, a review could mean the world. It DOES mean the world.
Kind words from strangers are what make the world go round. So please, leave that review, buy that book, or that art, or those earrings, and tell your friends!
Sharing is caring! Love and support those around you in every aspect! I guarantee you there are a lot of people out there dealing with the same mental strains that you are, and I promise you, that you are worthy of all the good things in this Life.
As a send out, I’d like to give one last piece of advice: Don’t give up! As much as I want to give up on some days, I know I shouldn’t. I know I need to keep going for no one other than myself. I am the one that is going to fulfill my dreams. I am the one that is going to look back at this and say, “you know what? I DID that!”
Similarly, YOU are the one that will make your dreams a reality. And I know it may be hard, it may get rough, bumpy, harrowing, whatever, but YOU are absolutely strong enough to push through. I believe in you!
And you know what? It will pay off!
Thanks for reading💕